The Hapless Hermit: Locker Room Bullies and Size Queens Take Note, Erection is the Great Equalizer

July 21, 2008

Locker Room Bullies and Size Queens Take Note, Erection is the Great Equalizer

For decades, poor, scared underdeveloped High School boys had to endure the shame of the post-gym shower. Oh the shame of not packing as much meat as your peers. Then there was the ordeal of going to the beach and having to wear some big giant balloon trunks to hide your less than average size genitals.

Or were they really average after all? The Hermit did some research and as clearly illustrated below, the smaller a penis is when flaccid, the more it will grow upon erection. It turns out that an overwhelming majority of erect penises fall between five and six and a half inches. Maybe five percent fall out of that range

cold and sleepy a little attention

getting there yipee!

So what were those high school bullies laughing at? The Hermit recommends that if someone in the shower is so interested in what size someone else's penis is, then perhaps he ought to kneel down, get a good view and use his mouth to bring the penis to full erection so he can really get a good idea as to what size it is.

becomes

then

As for you tramp stamped, tunneled twat, size queens, maybe you shouldn't give up on the "growers." Maybe that laughable nub might turn into a 7 inch pipe if you manipulate it right.

Then again, maybe if you stopped masturbating with extra large eggplants, watermelons, and baseball bats, you might one day be able to feel something down there again. Well maybe we can't blame you broads. Maybe you're just following the trends, bodies as tight as snare drums with pussies as loose as a goose.